Valentine’s Day is over but can we still talk about love? Not just in general, but let’s have a conversation about finding love in your 30s, specifically.
The big 3-0, Dirty 30 as some call it, 30 is the new 20… who comes up with these things? The world doesn’t quite seem like your oyster as it did when you were in your 20s. Sad to think, I know. But the reality is that 30s is a big milestone for a lot of people. There’s an old toxic cliche in our society where if you’re single, not engaged or married, or perhaps not starting a family in your 30s, that somehow you’re a failure. That something is wrong with you, or you’re not worthy of happiness, love, or commitment. These views are so messed up and just not true at all.
Remember this classic FRIENDS episode when Rachel turned 30?
There’s a shift happening in our society today where statistically, millennials are choosing to delay marriage until later in life or choosing not to get married at all. Gone are the days where women and men should feel pressured into locking themselves into a commitment when they’re clearly not ready, but because they feel that they are running out of time. Yes, there’s a biological factor for women to think this way, but it shouldn’t be a determining factor to settle for less. People have different goals in life. Some want to have successful careers, others find success in building a family. You have to start living your life in your own terms, and not by what outdated traditions tell you to.
With that said, let’s move on to what finding love in your 30s can be like.
Is it harder or easier?
It can be both. It’s easier in a sense that, around this age, you’ve somewhat of a better idea of what you’re looking for. For the most part, you have your career path established and have a good sense of individuality. You know who could be an ideal fit into your lifestyle. It can be harder in a way that unlike in your 20s, you’re not forced into social environment surrounded by people your age and in similar stage in life. It’s a challenge to navigate the endless dating apps out there or date someone who you don’t work with.
It’s more fulfilling
With the recent trend in this hook-up culture, it’s getting harder to build deeper connections. It’s certainly not true for every 30-something couples out there, but for the most part, being older means being more mature. You’ve had good and bad experiences that’s taught you some valuable life lessons. Lessons that you can then implement into how you handle relationship hiccups successfully.
Better Communication
I’m very guilty of being terrible at communicating my feelings because I spent my 20s not doing it properly. It’s something that I’m continuously working on and striving to be better at. Want to know why? Because I have a partner who constantly pushes me to improve and be better at it. Relationship experts will tell you over and over that great communication is key to a successful relationship.
More Fun Dates and Experiences
Let’s be honest, besides the love you give and receive, one of the best thing about being in a relationship is the companionship and having a partner to experience life with. The 20s might be your time to have careless adventures, but most 20-something year olds don’t have that much disposable income to be able to experience the best life has to offer. Dinner dates and vacations costs a good chunk, and couples in their 30s usually have established careers, meaning extra cash to afford those amazing memory making experiences.
So if you’re either approaching your 30s, or you already are, and worried about finding love at this stage, do not stress about it! There are plenty of advantages getting into a relationship at this time. As long as you’re ready and not willing to settle for less than what you deserve.
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Tampa blogger that loves to try new things! Loves to write about experiences that make her happy hoping to inspire others to find their own bliss.
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Kristine Nicole Alessandra
I think being at that age is not a big factor in finding love. Actually I think it will work for the better. You get to meet people who are more mature, more goal oriented and established in their chosen careers. I would advice people in their 30s to be patient and wait. The right one will come.
Lyosha
great advise! i find it is always a great time to find your love
Melanie williams
I loved reading this. I think finding love in later life is much better quality and also by 30s you have wised up to the players etc xx
Claudia Blanton
so many people rushed into serious relationships in their twenties, when I think, one can give so much more with the maturity that comes later on, starting in the ’30s!. Yes, that is easy to say for someone like me who has been married for over 25 years, but if I could do it all over again, I would not have rushed into attaching myself to someone until much later!
Great post!
Michael
Just like what they say, we have our own timelines. Don’t rush but enjoy things as they go.
Morgan @ Baby Got Balance
I think that everyone is different but can definitely say that being in my 30’s means I have a MUCH different view on most things compared to my 20’s.
Natasha Delort
As someone who previously dated someone in their late 30s while I was in my late 20s I can easily say age is nothing but a number. I think it really boils down to if you match up on your life goals that makes dating hard
Komal
I honestly still can’t believe people are putting age limits on this. People call in love at different times of their lives and when it is right for them!
Viano Dee
I love this post. I agree that it’s okay to find love in your 30’s and it has a lot of advantage. One of which is making better decisions because you know precisely what you want.